In an instant

The kids and I went to the State Fair yesterday with my mom. It was awesome. We saw llamas, and sheep, and longhorns. We saw baby pigs and tractor races and rode the monorail. We ate corn dogs and ice cream and drank lemonade. It was fun to see the kids react to the animals, and to riding the monorail and seeing the Fair from up above. It was fun to watch them slurp down the lemonade and ice cream. It was a fun day full of firsts for the kids.

The biggest first was the little kid rides. I bought tickets for Emma to ride the rides, and she was in heaven running around trying to decide what to ride. I was slightly apprehensive how she was going to do on them since she had never been on anything like it before. My plan was to ride along with her while my mom hung with Grant, but she insisted on her first ride being one I couldn't ride on.

"I'm fine riding by myself Mom" she says to me as she walks away to get in line. I hurry after her to hand the guy her ticket, and then watch as she marches off to pick her helicopter. I follow her from the outside of the gate, wondering if I should have gone with her to help her up, get her buckled in. She waits patiently for the guy to get to her, accepts his help getting into the helicopter and being buckled in. She scoots over so she's in front of the steering wheel, squeals in delight at the anticipation of the ride starting, and then waves at me and yells "HI MOM!". I wave back, snap a few pictures, and wave some more. The ride lurches as it starts, and I panic because she usually panics at unexpected things like that. I'm starting to offer reassuring words and trying to decide if it's okay to ask the guy to stop the ride to get her off when she squeals with delight again, and waves as her helicopter lifts up and the ride starts to turn. As she moves out of sight, I hear "Wheeeeeeeeee" and see her little hand poke out the window and wave to me.

And in an instant she grows up. Suddenly I see her for who she is becoming, no longer a little toddler, but instead a grown up Pre-Kindergartner. As the ride comes back around, and she's beaming with joy and waving to me, I see how tall she's become. How thin she is getting, how her plump little face is thinning. She comes around again, same beaming smile and enthusiastic wave, and I see how mature she is starting to look, and I get a glimpse at the emotions I'll be feeling when we drop her off at Kindergarten in one short year. When did she grow up?

The ride comes to an end, she clamors out and meets me at the exit gate, already talking about the next ride she wants to go on. She decides on the pink elephant ride, another one that goes up and down. "You ride with me mom" she says as she reaches for my hand.

I smile, and realize she's still my little girl for now.